Dealing

It's been a tough couple of days.

I suffered through about an hour of a friend's party on Sun. before I absolutely had to make a break for it. One 3-month old in the room was hard enough, when the second one came in, I though I would vomit.

I also thought I was prepared for Monday's beta. But, as soon as I sat down for the blood-draw and started trying to answer the required questions, I devolved into heaving chest, big ugly sobs. The nurse was very nice about it. I managed to gather myself together somewhat and went into work, but I e-mailed my supervisor immediately to tell him what was going on and that I needed as little face-to-face interaction with people as possible. Thankfully, he got it. So, by the time I got the official phone call around 2pm, I was able to handle it.

Yesterday, sorrow turned into anger, and made for another tough day.

Today, i just want this period to come, so I can turn this entire cycle into nothing but a memory.