I got back from a two-day conference for work last night. I couldn't get out of there fast enough. My company had a vendor booth, so between seminars and during breaks I had to schmooze, which is loathsome to me on its own. Add to that the fact that the woman manning the booth right next to ours was about 6-7 months pregnant, and a woman I know who was milling around was clearly about 8-9 months pregnant. I was horrified, depressed, and completely lost in my messed up mind. I wanted to be anywhere but there.
There is no escaping IF. I feel like it smacks me in the face everywhere and anywhere, when I least expect it, even. Work should be a safe zone, but of course it's not because I have to hear about others' grandchildren, children and expected babies. Friends and family offer no safety. Even the freaking gym isn't safe because of the pregnant women there. Event though our own home doesn't really feel safe from IF, as in I am reminded of IF while here because there's these 2 empty bedrooms and all, it still feels like the safest place to be because I can hide from the world. And, that's about all I want to do right now.
Can I just repeat how much I HATE IF?!
No comments:
Post a Comment